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I understand…

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Wait!!  Before you go calling Child Protective Services, get down off your soapbox and your idealisms and LET’S GET REAL.  

Background:  I am very traditional when it comes to parenting and family life.  I am Cuban-Colombian and was raised in a highly traditional home a-la “old school”.  Time out’s didn’t exist, the bottom was created for spanking, and we got spanked “cantando” where the spanks coincide with the syllables. 

Now, I will restate this, my husband and I decided as a unit that we would not spank our kids (ages 4 & 2).  Thankfully we have been able to stick to this.  There are loved ones that we know who believe in spanking, and that’s their prerogative.  That’s their child.  Yes, there are studies and data showing that spanking only makes for a more violent child, but not everyone believes everything they read.  Then there’s the old adage, “My parents spanked me and I turned out ok”, but really that can be applied to anything, just change the word spanked to abandoned, traumatized, loved, hated, spoiled, whatever, with the exceptions of the Ted Bundy’s of the world “ok” is a pretty safe catch-all.

Is it obvious at this point that I don’t want my kids to turn out “ok”?  I try to educate myself, I pray, I drink, I take “calmantes”, just to that my kids are under the impression that they have a level headed mother…and then my daughter turned 4…

She is a smart girl, and she know how to push mommy’s crazy button, and I haven’t been able to figure out how to disable that damn thing.  So when I’m being “calm” and speaking to her clearly and slowly (like the crazed maniac she can be) and she is doing this hoppy, flip-floppy fish dance, whining, faux-crying and making other noises likened to hyperventilating, I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND what would drive a parent to turn their little monster around and slap them on the butt.  Since I don’t partake, I instead try distraction, conversation, separation, threats, rescinding of privileges,  and then I turn into the you-wanna-see-mommy-mad-well-you-did-it-now banshee.

Hey, I said I didn’t spank, I didn’t say I was perfect!!  LOL!!!


About mzelma

Culturally ambidextrous renaissance woman. Mom, wife, daughter, entrepreneur, blogger, shiny and fabulous, just like home! Find out more at

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